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entry 1: ‘NAZI PUNX F*CK OFF!’

I was starting the misfits Box Set for the 2nd time today (‘Psycho 78!!’) when I got the text from the crew.

‘Yo we’re getting smashed tonight and smashing the system! Meet up outside in ten and bring stickers!’

I got outside and saw the crew scattered about talking and smoking. Punx Econ, Romphrey & Tumbleweed started passing out stickers that read ‘Condoms Are Murder’, ‘Kiss my punk Ass’ ‘Resist’ and more, I could tell things were going to get silly. As if to prove me right, I turned to see Graynt, blissful look, smoke exhaling from his gas mask suddenly taking a sticker to the face from Romphrey! They exploded into a scrap like ten tons of Cola & Mentos (Even Graynts duck Jeff got into it!)! 

We all egged ‘em on and let ‘em scrap it out. After a loud few minutes though, we heard the sirens and saw flashing red & blue. Straight away we split up and ducked down alleys, backyards and city streets! Harrow and Skelly were still slappin stickers on everything in site as we ran! It was fuckin amazing!

We all arrived at the Drunk Fucker at about the same time, finding Trece & Satoshi Nakamoto popped up (yes the real Satoshi), spliffs and even more stickers in hand (a little late for the mayhem was what I was thinking), ready to see the bands! We all caught up, hearing about everyone’s near death escapes and exploits in property damage fleeing from the cops. Everyone stoned and tipsy agree, we need a bite and head into the pub. 

The lights are low and the music is loud even though it’s just the house system still the kind playing cds but at least the DF has some good shite. All of us are taking our regular stations around the bar when we hear shouting from the entrance and realize, our vandalism might have caught up with us, but what the fuck do we care? We planned to rumble tonight anyway, just not this soon but the look in Romphrey’s eyes says it all- “Fuck it” and we head back out.

The crowd parts and we find we’re surrounded by a bunch of biscuit eating crybaby nazi fucks and their Evil overlord Grandma callin the shots (a nasty lookin roller pin in her pruny mits)!  It was a real fuckin smash up- fists, steel batons, broken bottles even forks and knives from the pub found their way into the mix. These racist pieces of shit were no match for our punk as fuck  brand of justice. Last standing from their sorry lot was Granny, the toughest of em all. It took all of us combined to wear her down but it was Skelly (did I not mention Skelly was a skinless animated companion to Harrow?) and Satoshi sends Doge to distract granny, successfully clearing the way for a biscuit smash to the crotch to finally run her off. 

The sirens were hunting us again so we broke out again, this time at least sticking together!

A dark alley we had sheltered in on more than one crazy adventure we thought was going to hide us for the night, but we were wrong. A solitary beat cop was waiting baton in hand was ready to take us all on! We launched our exhausted bodies at him and one by one took our licks but fuckin gave ‘em just the same! Zyon702 was throwing cats for Christ sake! Spu and Singlescope put the final blows that took him out.

There was no way we could hit the neighborhood again after stirring up all this heat, especially after beating up a pig!

Tumbleweed pulled a joint out of some porcelain mongoose and started passing a pipe around and we decided (stoned af) to collectively spend the night in the woods. Getting into the woods was easy but we’re fucking beat! We just took a little break and it’s giving me a little time to sober up and jot this all down. It’s a night I never want to forget! But I will say I’m glad it’s over….

wait, there’s something out here with us……